

Star Trek: Insurrection (1998)

Grade: 28

The ninth in an apparently endless series of films
based upon the television series "Star Trek", this is
also the third film to use the "Next Generation"
cast.  "Insurrection" gives us the answer to the
question, what would happen if a one-hour show is
stretched to a two-hour film?  While the cinematography
is better and the budget is bigger, it seems that we
have been down this road before, and too many times.
Special effects, techno-babble, and makeup that looks
like uncomfortable rubber scarecrows take the place
of plot, dialogue and character development.

Midway through "Insurrection", there are attempts to
add some warmth to the formulaic sci-fi fantasy action
plot.  Fearless captain Picard (Patrick Stewart) gets
a platonic love interest with uninteresting Donna Murphy,
while the android Data (Brent Spiner) is taught how to
play by an uninteresting pre-adolescent.

Romance is rekindled between director/second banana Riker
(Jonathan Frakes) and consellor Troi (Marina Sirtis),
both of whom are unbearably smug as a result.
There's also some kind of moral about the evils of
technology, and that it is wrong to steal planets from
people.

Then, it is back to the fantasy action adventure, with
Picard and his heroic crew rescuing the gentle, peace-abiding
villagers from the ugly mutants attempting to dislocate
them.  The plot is reconciled in wholly predictable fashion,
with nothing being done to prevent Star Trek X from appearing
in theatres two years hence.

Since the formula has run aground, I have a suggestion
for Frakes and Rick Berman.  Why not make "Star Trek X"
a musical?  Picard can perform "MacArthur Park".  Frakes can
sing "You're So Vain".  LaForge would sing "I Can See Clearly
Now".  Data will perform "Hooked on a Feeling".  Troi can
warble "Torn Between Two Lovers" while Whorf tackles "In the
Year 2525".  Sure, Trekkie fans would feel alien-ated,
but perhaps it would be a cult film classic, like
"Rocky Horror Picture Show".

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