Subject: Retrospective: Tank Girl (1995)

From: James Brundage <[email-masked]>
Date: 24 Jan 1999 21:33:13 GMT

Tank Girl (1995, R)

Directed by Rachel Talalay

Written by Tedi Sarafien

Based upon the comic book.

Staring Lori Petty, Naomi Watts, Ice-T, and Malcolm MacDowell.

 I don't know what it is.  Maybe it's just that I'm a New Jersey mallrat.
Maybe it's the fact that I'm a lifeless film geek who can fall in love with
a story about a girl and her tank.  Then again, maybe I'm just insane.
 But, really, with a movie as fun as Tank Girl, who gives a damn?
 Tank Girl could be viewed, if you want to put it intellectually, as a
parody of post-apocolyptical nightmare movies.  Hell, it's a lot more fun
that watching The Postman.  If you want to put it intellectually, Tank Girl
could be taken as an anti-facist document.  It could be taken as a warning
of the evils of greed.  It could be taken as a feminist protest, or as a
showing of lesbian idealism.  It could be the new film for the group that
boldly states "I am woman, hear me roar", whoever they are this day of the
week.

 But, you know what, that's all bullshit.  Tank Girl isn't intellectual, it
isn't literary, it isn't philosophical in any way shape or form that I could
discern.  Then why did I enjoy it?  Because I'm human and it was fun.

 Tank Girl follows (*gasp*) Tank Girl (Lori Petty) and Jet Girl (Naomi
Watts) on their battle against Water and Power, headed by an evil mad
scientist played by Malcolm MacDowell, who revives his unique insanity that
he displayed in Stanley Kubrick's A Clockwork Orange.

 The year is 2033 and, ever since a comet struck the Earth 14 years ago,
it's been a little different.  No celebrities, no cable TV, NO WATER.  But,
in the words of Tank Girl herself, "about 20 people have to shower together,
so it ain't all bad".

 Tank Girl is about like any other Gen-X heroine, sarcastic, sexy, able to
kill people using her legs without breaking a nail.  She's beer drinking,
she's boxing, she's going around as a rebel stealing water from the
notorious W&P (Water and Power).  Of course, W&P decides to take them out
and she barely survives.  She's captured, but not before seeing her
boyfriend die and killing eight W&P soldiers.  Oh, well.

 Tank Girl's put to work as a slave in W&P and still keeps her sarcasm.  The
evil scientist in charge wants her to work for him, but, being the hooker
with the heart of gold that she is, she refuses.  And, of course, she
befriends a disgruntled jet technician, Jet Girl.  Jet Girl's just fitting
in, trying not to let her supervisor get in her greasy overalls, but she's
about to fail at that goal when (*all guys cheer*) lesbian kiss!

 Ok.  Since I've laid it out in pure English with more sarcasm than Imus,
I'm only going to ASSUME you're following me.  Basically, Tank Girl steals a
Tank and Jet Girl steals a jet, and they get away from W&P.  But we're not
done yet, gotta kill the bad guy.  So the evil scientist takes a little girl
that's a friend of Tank Girl's, holds her hostage while he waits for Tank
Girl to come and save her.

 Tank and Jet, ever out of their minds and cracking jokes, get the help of
the Rippers, an army of half-kangaroo, half-man soldiers who all believe
their someone reincaranted (one of them believes he was Jack Keorack,
another believes he was a dog).

 I'll be the first to admit that Tank Girl has absolute zero as far as
redeeming value is concerned.  But, you know what, I find that if I expect a
drama each time I go to the theatre, I just get pissed off.  So, you know
what, I'm looking at Tank Girl as a comic book movie, as a sarcastic dark
comedy.  And, as far as those go, Tank Girl's an 88mm.