I read a very interesting book, or rather listened to it as an audio-book. "No Longer Human" by Osamu Dazai.

It is about a life's story of a man struggling to relate to other people, fearing them tremendously. In order to conceal himself he act as a clown, doing what he can to draw attention from his true person.

It is not a happy life but he still manages to have a life full of experiences. Despite of despising other people he was still able to form relationships.

It was written in the 1940s but it doesn't feel old, other than for a few references to housekeeping servants and a dated references to an "automobile". It is very well written. It is apparently the second most sold book in Japan. I can understand why, it feels very genuine and heartfelt, entirely unlike how the main character treats his friends.

I think it illustrates very well how a persons perception of themselves or others may not reflect how others see them and vice versa.

I read a few reviews about the book and I found it interesting is that while many like the book they have very different interpretations of the book.

The main character gloomy outlook on the world in some ways match my own. It was interesting to read how he dealt with his life. Often poorly. I have always wanted to have some suggestions to how one can live a life. For this reason I still found the story wholesome in a bizarre way.

When someone is struggling you do not help them by pointing out positives. That is just invalidating their experiences. It means that they have to walk their dark path alone.